I sit and I wait for the minutes to pass
But no such luck
I'm stuck in the abyss that is my mind
Trying to avoid
From what you ask
From me I say
Those crazy thoughts
They are in charge
As long as I'm awake
I'm in control
I'm the boss
It's me that's in charge
I can pull it off tonight
Wait and see
You name it
I'm doing it
I will stay awake
I will not succumb
I'm a pro
No nodding off
U will not consume me
No nodding off
Don't cave in
Friday, August 31, 2012
Religion is appreciated
If you are smart
Check your brain
At the door
Open your heart
And close your eyes
And if you have no
It will hit you
In the face
Be open minded
Don’t judge others
Live the life
That you want
And do what
You think is best
But be your best
Thursday, August 30, 2012
As an ISFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you takes things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system.
ISFJs live in a world that is concrete and kind. They are truly warm and kind-hearted, and want to believe the best of people. They value harmony and cooperation, and are likely to be very sensitive to other people's feelings. People value the ISFJ for their consideration and awareness, and their ability to bring out the best in others by their firm desire to believe the best.
ISFJs have a rich inner world that is not usually obvious to observers. They constantly take in information about people and situations that is personally important to them, and store it away. This tremendous store of information is usually startlingly accurate, because the ISFJ has an exceptional memory about things that are important to their value systems. It would not be uncommon for the ISFJ to remember a particular facial expression or conversation in precise detail years after the event occured, if the situation made an impression on the ISFJ.
ISFJs have a very clear idea of the way things should be, which they strive to attain. They value security and kindness, and respect traditions and laws. They tend to believe that existing systems are there because they work. Therefore, they're not likely to buy into doing things in a new way, unless they're shown in a concrete way why its better than the established method.
ISFJs learn best by doing, rather than by reading about something in a book, or applying theory. For this reason, they are not likely to be found in fields which require a lot of conceptual analysis or theory. They value practical application. Traditional methods of higher education, which require a lot of theorizing and abstraction, are likely to be a chore for the ISFJ. The ISFJ learns a task best by being shown its practical application. Once the task is learned, and its practical importance is understood, the ISFJ will faithfully and tirelessly carry through the task to completion. The ISFJ is extremely dependable.
The ISFJ has an extremely well-developed sense of space, function, and aesthetic appeal. For that reason, they're likely to have beautifully furnished, functional homes. They make extremely good interior decorators. This special ability, combined with their sensitivity to other's feelings and desires, makes them very likely to be great gift-givers - finding the right gift which will be truly appreciated by the recipient.
More so than other types, ISFJs are extremely aware of their own internal feelings, as well as other people's feelings. They do not usually express their own feelings, keeping things inside. If they are negative feelings, they may build up inside the ISFJ until they turn into firm judgments against individuals which are difficult to unseed, once set. Many ISFJs learn to express themselves, and find outlets for their powerful emotions.
Just as the ISFJ is not likely to express their feelings, they are also not likely to let on that they know how others are feeling. However, they will speak up when they feel another individual really needs help, and in such cases they can truly help others become aware of their feelings.
The ISFJ feels a strong sense of responsibility and duty. They take their responsibilities very seriously, and can be counted on to follow through. For this reason, people naturally tend to rely on them. The ISFJ has a difficult time saying "no" when asked to do something, and may become over-burdened. In such cases, the ISFJ does not usually express their difficulties to others, because they intensely dislike conflict, and because they tend to place other people's needs over their own. The ISFJ needs to learn to identify, value, and express their own needs, if they wish to avoid becoming over-worked and taken for granted.
ISFJs need positive feedback from others. In the absence of positive feedback, or in the face of criticism, the ISFJ gets discouraged, and may even become depressed. When down on themselves or under great stress, the ISFJ begins to imagine all of the things that might go critically wrong in their life. They have strong feelings of inadequacy, and become convinced that "everything is all wrong", or "I can't do anything right".
The ISFJ is warm, generous, and dependable. They have many special gifts to offer, in their sensitivity to others, and their strong ability to keep things running smoothly. They need to remember to not be overly critical of themselves, and to give themselves some of the warmth and love which they freely dispense to others.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
“Gold” is the soul;
“silver,” the body;
“copper,” the voice;
“blue,” the veins;
“purple,” the flesh;
“red,” the blood;
“flax,” the intestines;
“goat hair,” the hair;
“ram skins dyed red,” the skin of the face;
“tachash skins,” the scalp;
“shittim wood,” the bones;
“oil for lighting,” the eyes;
“spices for the anointing oil and for the sweet incense,” the nose, mouth and palate;
“shoham stones and gemstones for setting,” the kidneys and the heart.
THE ANALOG OF THE IBN EZRA
The analog first boldly drawn by the Ibn Ezra (12th century, Spain) in his commentary to Bereshit 1:26 now returns with unusual force:
…God forbid that the Creator should have any corporeal qualities or tangible form. Behold the text proclaims "'to whom shall you compare Me that I might be similar?' says the Holy One" (Yeshayahu 40:25). Rather, because the supernal soul of man is eternal, it therefore shares an affinity with God. So too the soul is incorporeal and it also fills the whole body with life. The human body is thus like a miniature world. Blessed be God who began by fashioning the great cosmos and concluded by fashioning man, the microcosm!
For Ibn Ezra, there was a parallel to be drawn between HaShem the Creator and the soul of the human being. HaShem is utterly without body or form, but His eternal spirit of "glory" fills the material cosmos and inspires it with life and meaning. Similarly, though we must regard Ibn Ezra's words with caution as a provocative analog that can convey only part of the matter, the human soul, ethereal and eternal, grants life to the human body, filling it with potential and purpose after the manner of the Creator. And the Mishkan as well, representing the proverbial link between heaven and earth, is thus constructed according to a similar dynamic. We return once again to the laden words of the Ibn Ezra, this time in his discussion of the meaning of the Mishkan, where he advances the explanation of Rav Sa'adia Gaon (10th century, Babylon):
The Gaon explained that there are in fact three worlds. This terrestrial world is the macrocosm, the Mishkan is intermediate, and the human body is the microcosm…(commentary to Shemot 25:7).
While the Gaon goes on to draw specific comparisons between heavenly elements, the items of the Mishkan, and the organs of the human body, who could deny the overall persuasiveness of his linkage?
Head = Heichal
The Ohel Moed (the Tent of Meeting) was divided into two rooms. The back room was called the Kodesh HaKadashim, the Holy of Holies. Placed in this room was the Aron, Holy Ark, the most sacred of the articles in the Sanctuary. The Holy Ark consisted of three boxes, one inside the other. The innermost box contained the two tablets upon which the Ten Commandments were engraved. These Commandments were the outline of all the mitzvot in the Torah. It represented the brain of the perfect man. Just as a brain has two hemispheres, the right and the left, so too there were two tablets. Just as man contemplates only Torah ideas and ideals, so too the Ark contained the essence of Torah. Just as the brain is triply encased in a skull with two membranes, the tablets were also encased in three boxes.
We can also view the brain in a second way: The brain is enclosed in a double membrane, and the entrance to the Kodesh HaKadashim was through a double curtain.
Brain = Ark of the Covenant.
The brain has two major portions, the left and right hemispheres of the brain. These two correspond with the two Luchot, the tablets on which were inscribed the ten commandments.
The Holy of Holies houses the Ark of the Covenant topped by the two winged Kruvim (cherubim), one of which represents HaShem, while the other represents Israel. The Divine voice heard by man emerges from between these two Kruvim.
When Moses arrived at the Ohel Moed to speak with HaShem, he heard the voice speaking to him from atop the cover that was upon the Ark of the Testimony, from between the two cherubim, and He spoke to him. (Bamidbar 7:88)
Additionally, as Torah is wisdom and is stored in the ark, so, too, does wisdom come from the brain of man.
Cranial Membrane = Curtain.
Chazal teach that the curtain moved rhythmically in and out as though moved by the breath of a man.
Eyes = Menorah + Shulchan.
The eyes are used for two purposes. One is used for intellectual pursuits, enlightenment, symbolized by the light of the Menorah. Just as the Menorah's fuel was the purest of oil, so too should man strive for the purity of enlightenment. According to the Kabbalists, there are seven areas of spiritual wisdom and the seven branches of the Menorah represent them. The second function of the eyes is for survival: to see and avoid pitfalls, to search out food in order to live; this is symbolized by the showbread (Shulchan).
Ears = Chamber of Hewn Stone
As the ears are partly internal and partly external to the body, so, too, the Sanhedrin met in the chamber of hewn stone which was partly inside the Temple and partly outside.
The Sanhedrin “heard” cases.
Nose = Golden Altar of Incense
Just as the nose is the organ of smell and is located in the center of the face, the Golden Altar was located in the center of the room and upon it the fragrant smelling incense was offered. The incense had great mystical meaning and represented the spreading of pleasantness among men. This offering brought atonement for gossip and tale bearing.
Mouth = Door to the Heichal.
The opening of the Kodesh (the Holy place), which led to the Azara (Courtyard), was at the bottom of the room. It represented the mouth of man. Here the kohanim (Priests) stood when they uttered the priestly benediction every morning.
Why did HaShem communicate to Moshe through the child-like Kruvim? Are the Kruvim the mouth?
Salivary glands = Laver.
As the salivary glands provide water at the entrance to the mouth, so too does the laver provide water at the “mouth” of the Heichel (the sanctuary building).
Heart = The base of the altar
The sacrificial blood was dashed against the altar and then poured out at the base of the altar. As the altar has four corners, so too does the heart have four chambers. As the heart has a higher and and lower part, so too does the altar have a red line that marks the upper and lower parts (some offerings had their blood dashed above and some had the blood dashed below).
Stomach = Altar
Outside the Ohel Moed / Heichel, in the center of the courtyard, was the main Altar upon which the sacrifices were offered and consumed. This represents the stomach and internal organs of man.
The sacrifices were also called food:
Vayikra (Leviticus) 3:11 And the priest shall burn it upon the altar: it is the food of the offering made by fire unto HaShem.
As the stomach is slightly off-center, so, too, is the altar slightly off-center.
Notice that we speak of the stomach as having “heart-burn”, just as the altar burns, so our stomach burns.
Umbilical cord = The smoke from the altar
As the smoke originated on the altar and exited the Beit HaMikdash from the altar, so too does the umbilical cord connect to the stomach and exit from the stomach.
Esophagus = Altar Ramp.
The sacrifices were carried up the ramp and laid on the altar. Even so, the food is carried by the esophagus to the stomach.
Sex organs = Fifteen steps between the men’s and women’s courtyards.
The Levitical choir would sing the fifteen Psalms / Songs of Ascent while standing on these fifteen steps, during Succoth. Succoth is, of course, the quintessential picture of the marital chamber. The words of the Levites represent the sperm and the music represents the semen. The movements of the Levitical choir represents the thrusts of the organ.
Next to these semi-circular steps were two rooms used to store the musical instruments. These seem to represent the testes. They are the instruments from which the music originates. The music gives force to the lyrics.
Skin = Wall
Ashes = Waste Product.
The ashes were stored in the center of the brazen altar until carried outside the camp. Even so, the waste product of a man is connected to the stomach and exits at the center of the body.
Fetus = Giant lampstands In the Courtyard
Another ceremony of Succoth, the illumination of the Temple, also had it's source in Jewish tradition. According to the Mishna, at the end of the first day of Tabernacles, the priests and Levites went down to the court of the women. Four enormous golden candlesticks were set up in the court (fifty cubits high) with four golden bowls placed upon them and four ladders resting against each. Four youths of priestly descent stood at the top of the ladders holding ten-gallon pitchers filled with pure oil, which they poured into each bowl (Succah 5:2).
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
mywounds are healing
scars are fading
ears are trained
to hear the words
music is playing
rocked the boat
lived in the past
love will pour
mind at ease
Friday, August 3, 2012
|some woman wrote:|
I am the "second wife" and I think you are mean.
Why would you wish bad things on me?
You don't even know who I am!
Just because he wasn't good for you doesn't mean he's not great for me.
Let me have a chance to finally live me life - happily! I deserve it - I guess you do too but you have to step back and stop being jealous and wishing bad. Your time might come when you are happily married - now it is my turn and since I never did anything to you please just let me live!
Learn how to be nice!
so i answered:
Wow! this hit me like a ton of bricks! you are 100% right! I just re read what i wrote and i noticed the date was january. im glad to see i have changed so much since then. please forgive me